Wednesday, January 13, 2010

My Vision Board for 2010

So I created a vision board back in 2009 and believe it or not - I achieved most of my goals! So here we go again - new year, new goals. I created this from Oprah's website in a section called "O Dream Board". It was very easy to use. You can choose to hide the "written intention" of each picture or to show your intentions. The only downside to using Oprah's board is that you can not save the file as you would a picture, but thanks to my computer savvy,BFC buddy, Amber - she suggested I find a screen capture software. So I googled for free screen capture software and came across Wisdom-soft screenhunter 5.1 and I was able to snapshot my computer so I could share with everyone! Thanks Amber!!!!!

Monday, January 4, 2010

A New Year - a New Me!

So I can’t believe I have not blogged since Dec 23rd. What a whirlwind the holidays can be. I still held myself accountable by tracking my food and checking in with my Twitter group, but WOW – where has the time gone. Here comes week 11 and I am down 20lbs Do you realize that would be like me carrying out from the grocery store – 4 lbs of flour?

In the last few weeks it has been slow going – I have only been losing a lb or 2 a week, but now I decided that it’s ok to go slow. I would take a slow loss over a quick loss any day because I FEEL great and have felt great over this whole last 10 weeks. Obviously, I don’t feel as weighed down because of the weight loss, but there is something to not having all that sugar in your system. It’s more than just my skin looking so healthy or my hair growing so well. Before I used to feel sick after I ate any meal. It didn’t matter if it was a small portion or not. Usually just after my meal I wouldn’t feel “right”. I even went so far as to go to a gastro specialist to make sure it wasn’t something more. I am now convinced – the ‘something more” was all that sugar. On Thanksgiving and Christmas I allowed myself a taste (and when I say a taste – it was not your average piece of pie – it was maybe 3 spoonfuls of it) of my Dad’s homemade pumpkin pie – o.k. - forget calling this emotional eating because it wasn’t - I just happen to straight up LOVE pumpkin pie! After eating it on both Holidays, I didn’t feel so good afterwards – just like before this program. I know it was the sugar count in the pie. My family was eating leftovers just after Christmas and out came that pie and you know what… I couldn’t eat it. I just didn’t want to feel like that again. Truth… I will probably forget next year by the time Thanksgiving rolls around on how I felt this year and I probably will ‘indulge” in a “taste” of pie, but it definitely won’t be any time soon!

This New Years I did a new vision board (found a great one called a dream board on Oprah’s website). I took the time out to create it and print it (only downside is that you can not save it as a .pdf file because I would love to post it on my computer – but I did mount it on my fridge. Hey, if I have time to log my food like a madman than I can take some “me time” to focus my life for the New Year. It’s funny because in New Years past - I would just begin that emotional climb to attempt at some sort of weight loss – heck at this point I touched the flag at the top of the mountain and I’m walking back down! My new goal is to be at my target weight by my birthday in June. I have grown so much in the last few months that I TRULY feel that anything is possible. This has not been one more way that I let myself down- it has been about setting the course to a better life for me and my daughter. At this stage in the game, I am in control and I pick where I want to go. I feel somewhat corny at how excited and hopeful I have become. I can be my worst critic and I have found that this program has truly made me “nicer to myself”. Stay tuned because the finish line is within reach!

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Forgot to Post my Weigh In from Monday

My Weight:

My Waist:

Christmas Obstacles - Revaluation Time

So I am in Week 9 of this 12 week plan and as I am approaching Christmas, I felt like I needed a little bit of a regroup. Don’t get me wrong, I am doing great on the plan, but I just wanted to refocus before the obstacles come my way. Before I started this plan, I was the heaviest I had ever been. I think there is a point in each of us where we say, “This has to stop here”. So I put on the brakes and buckled in and committed to “12 weeks for a better me”. So I am nearing the 20lb weight loss marker and 3.5 inches gone from my waist and I feel lighter and happier than I have been in a long time. Wow, in nine weeks I have unloaded almost 4 bags of flour. I don’t want to get complacent though and not finish the race or allow Christmas obstacles to hold me back. Also, somewhere in this program I realized this has to be a life change for me, not a diet to reach a magic number and then go back to old ways – only to watch the weight creep back up again.
Since mid October I have not touched a real slice of pizza. At this point, I know this is trigger food for me so better to not try at all. I only fell off the program once with a piece of my daughter Halloween candy about a week after Halloween (Butterfinger – to be exact) which led to a downward spiral week and a slight gain. I have to note here that eating that candy made me sick. The sugar hurt my stomach and turned me off of chocolate. In a warped way, I’m not too disappointed about that. Thanksgiving Day I was in control and allowed myself to indulge in a “taste” of my Dad’s homemade pumpkin pie and believe it or not – that was enough. I think I was the only one who did not go home feeling bloated & stuffed like a turkey (no pun intended). During these past nine weeks, I battled with my internal self to recognize emotional eating from actual hunger. I realized that years of Splenda did some “temporary” damage. This opened up my eyes to the real impact of foods. I learned to not walk through a supermarket aimlessly and without purpose. Ironically, I used to hate food shopping, now it has become like a game of seek and find, and there is a certain thrill into finding that “hidden gem” in an aisle that fits into my 5/2 count that I didn’t know existed.
Would I like to have lost more weight by now – sure. It’s funny because before I started this plan, I said, “If I could only lose 20lbs – it would be a start to my goal – it would be more than what I have been able to do on my own”. Now that I lost almost that weight, it gets you excited (maybe a little impatient) to think “well, what about another twenty?” and “if I reached my goal by the Springtime, I’ll actually have a Summer that I like what I look like in shorts – dare I say even a bathing suit”. I’m not sure if it is so much about impatience or it’s like a snowball effect – only this time I am snowballing in the right direction and for the right reasons.
Can I say that I will NEVER indulge in ANY foods that exceed my 5/2 count? No, but I can make the sacrifice till I reach my goal weight and be modest thereafter? Absolutely, I can – it is a small amount of time in the big picture of it all. I wasted much more time gaining the weight and feeling lousy about myself. There will be other Christmas’ that I can allow myself a “taste” of a gingerbread or in the summer walking on a boardwalk, I may enjoy one slice of “real” pizza, but I won’t go back to the way I was before. These holiday obstacles are just little “road bumps” that I made look like “large boulders”. I will not give them that much meaning in my life. The meaning of my life is in the people I have around me, and the time we share. You never know how much time you have with anyone – so Holidays are not about the foods you eat, but the memories you make. This year, I will be “present” in any pictures we take (just like at Thanksgiving – my halfway photo that I can actually say I liked). There will be no hiding because years from now – when I look back on this holiday, I can say to my daughter, “That was the year that Mommy took control of her life and when she made herself more important than the food around her.” “Look how happy we were and still are”!

Friday, December 11, 2009

Steps to a better me!

When I started this "meal plan", I knew that I was in need of a good reality check. So this plan could not have come at a better time. I needed to accept the size I was (size 14 - I can now admit that - now a 12), determine where I wanted to be, how I would get there and more importantly to get to a better place mentally and love who I was no matter what the size.
A few months back, I was making photo albums for my daughter of each year of her life and I realized that there were so few pictures of me in those memories. Six years have gone by and I was more comfortable behind the camera, but I was cutting myself right out of her memories. If I have learned anything recently with the failing health of both my parents - life is too short to cut yourself out. What was I teaching my daughter in the process?
I feel bad for those people who have negated the Belly Fat Cure because they felt it was "failing them". A diet is about lbs. - this is a meal plan to a better you - a healthier you. Health is not just about a scale its about taking ownership of your mind & body. I take ownership to the weight I've gained before this program (years of poor choices and misinformation), but I own the weight that I have lost on this program (13lbs and about 5 lbs. before the program) and to the weight that I could have lost if I didn't cheat during one of the weeks or a week I was too busy to log my food. Ultimately, it has to be about more than just some 4lb. marker for me. It has to be about this reality check that has led to a journey of sorts. This is a journey of steps - steps that one day the step is a weight loss (maybe even only a lb.), next step may be a success that prior to this plan I would have tumbled, and the next step is the fact that I can look at myself in the mirror and not cringe and think back to a time that I looked or felt better - because that time is now! Oh heck, Thanksgiving week - that step was the fact that I didn't gain anything at all - I didn't lose but I didn't gain either. I may not lose 4lbs a week, and I had years of misinformation so I could have perceived myself as unlucky because I needed to take probiotics and wait & be patient for a good week's results. But I don't think that way - I can't think that way. Jorge can't do this for me - I have to do this for the self I am today, and the self I want to be when I am old, and for my lil' girl. She is soooo proud of her Mommy! She has taken this journey with me, and I didn't even realize it! A week before I started this program, she had to use the word "big" in a sentence and she wrote - "My Mom is big". Ouch! Wow! Again, with the reality check! Now if I am laying on my stomach watching t.v. - she comes and puts her head on my bottom and asks "Why is your butt smaller - I can't use it as a pillow?" Oh yeah! Reality check! Write down your steps... you just may surprise yourself on how many steps you have climbed in such a short time!